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Late teens, too tight for tampons and sex, has only gotten worse with time? So, I'm in my late teens... technically, but I don't like to believe in the concept of age.
I had my first pap smear a few weeks ago, and my doctor had to use the virginal sized tools... and it was still extremely painful. I have never had an STD and I have never been pregnant, but I'm not a virgin. I haven't had sex in a long time, and not all that much, but it has happened before.
Male-female sex has always hurt for me, and has often been impossible, and is only ever possible after a lot of work, pain, and effort.
I've always been tight, but possibly due to exercise? and also the fact that it's been a long time since I was in a relationship with someone who I was sleeping with, and it didn't happen on a regular basis or for a long time... And the doctor who gave me my pap smear test told me that I am abnormally tight and that it is also probably only getting worse every time I've attempted anything sexual or otherwise, because my body has all now instinctively tightened up even further to prevent the painful activities taking place at all.
The problem is, I'm in a relationship with someone right now, and I am very very interested in him, and at some point down the track, if we are fully committed to staying together and in love, I'm thinking it'd be nice to be able to make love to him, or at least have him touch me without pain...
I'm too tight to even finger myself or use tampons... thank god I don't need another pap test for 3 years...
I hate not being able to use tampons because it would be so much more convenient I'm sure... and it'd be nice to actually be able to have someone I care about touch me and have it feel nice.
The doctor who gave me my pap smear told me that I am absolutely not allowed to even try to have sex with anyone unless I do certain things beforehand. She wants me to work on fingering myself and so on and trying to make it bearable and possible.... and says that when the time comes that I want to have sex with someone, that they have to be able to fit at least two fingers inside me without it hurting before they're allowed to actually try to have sex with me... and I just don't see this ever being possible. The only way it's ever worked before with sex, even if I was very worked up, was if we basically eventually managed to just force it to work.
Does anyone have any ideas or solutions? | I think what is adding to the problem is that you convinced yourself that nothing will work, that fingering is impossible, that whatever you try will be extremely painful and just impossible. You are putting a wall up in your mind that will be very difficult to overcome.
Start by changing your way of thinking about this. Yes, you have a problem, but it can be done. I had a friend who had the same problem and it took time and patience but it worked out fine in the end. In the beginning don't even try penetration with your finger, just play around on the outside. If you think about penetration you will tighten up. Forget penetration. Rather focus on pleasuring yourself until you'll feel a want and need to go further. Take your time even if it take weeks and months.
It is a muscle and a muscle can be trained. Be kind to yourself and don't see your vagina as something apart from you. It is part of you and you will become best friends in time.
Educate yourself by reading up on this, if need be see another gyni for more info. Good luck! | Why don't most teens remain virgin until they get married ? Before you start bashing me, I am not saying all teenagers are like that, hell no ! But an increasing number of them sure are. Isn't that what the Bible teaches us ? Why that urge in F-----G verything that moves ? Can't they develop other hobbies like observing the nature, read a book, play violin or something ? They do not have any more identities, it's really sad. You look at some teenage girls today and they barely look like a pair of inflated boobs, tight ***, but .... no brain...purely a sex toy. There's no more mystic in todays girls : They seem to ask: : Bang me hard and hurry up, I've got others lining up.
Can't they just read the Bible every day and stay away from the flesh until they find true love and get married and stay that way forever ?
Young boys are, (again not all of them), only interested in sex, or violence, not love. As a matter of fact, people don't say anymore "we made love" but rather "we had sex" like if it was some kind of sport event ! Truly sad era. | | I know that I told my parents and everyone I knew that I was going to wait until I was married, or at least 18 to lose it. But **** happens and sometimes we lose control. I'm turning 18 and I've only had one partner and he's only had me, and we're still together. It was a decision that we made together and that took almost over a year to come to a conclusion about. We've been together for almost 3 years. I do know 12 and 13 year olds who sleep around and dress/look like they're old enough to drink, and it depresses me, especially since my sister is one of them (she just turned15). She's been dating since she was 12/13, has had several boyfriends, drinks, and likes to "party" -- I have strong doubts that she's still a virgin. It really kills me. I just pray she doesn't turn out to be a pregnant 15 year old. Oh, and my boyfriend and I hardly ever say "we had sex", he actually feels weird saying it when it comes to us, so he and I always says make love. I won't blame me losing my virginity on my lack of knowledge from the Bible, because I've read it, go to church, and am a Christian follower. I think that when it comes down to having sex, it has nothing to do with the Bible or family. It just happens because you're alone with your guy/girl and you get curious. Some people just get too curious and want to experiment with various people. | Is there a chance my girlfriend will be really tight? My girlfriend and I have talked about having sex and we are ready. I have a question though... She is 5 foot 2, around 100 lbs, she is a teen, she is a virgin. and she is korean. Are those signs that she will be very tight? Or is that just a bunch of bull? | | She probably will. The first time she'll likely be so tight it hurts, so just be gentle. From my experience, Asians actually are tighter. | Why is virgin's so tight? besides the fact that they never had sex ...I mean are they that tight at all ages ? Are they all this tight or is it just the teen years etc.. or are there some that stay tight all there sexuall life etc.. I prefer girls or women to only answear this question ...as they probley know better then men... | | Honey I am a 27 year old and I was always told I was tight. I even had a guy but it was C-section, cuz of how tight I was. I think that once you get older and have guyren you become LOOSE, when your a Virgin its the first time your pussy is stretched out, unless you inserted HUGE things in there befor. | Virginity question? Is it true that an adult virgin's first time will possibl hurt more than a teenager's first time? (teenager - I mean 16-17 yr old)
I read that somewhere because teen virgins's muscles are less tight due to puberty. Adult virgins are tighter than teen virgins, therefore it might hurt more Is it true? | it would depend entirely on the indervidual.
however, if anything, wouldn't it be totally the other way round? teenagers are less likely to be properly and fully developed then an adult.
interesting question, anyway XD
xxxxxx | How can I loosen up my foreskin? my girlfriend and i have had sex recently, and it hurt for both of us. we're both still teens and virgins, and i can understand why it hurts for her, but it hurts so much for me. it feels like my foreskin is being ripped every time i enter
is there any way i can loosen up my foreskin without resorting to surgery? i mean, my foreskin's pretty tight
any advice would be appreciated, thanks in advance ! | | Google foreskin stretching exercises. With gradual, non-painful, stretching you can loosen it up on your own without any surgery with a few months. It's just skin like any other place on the body, and can stretch to accommodate just about anything. | ALL TEENS+PARENTS: What do you think of this? PLEASE READ!!!? Recently, the lingerie and clothing company Victoria’s Secret has become more suggestive with their products. No, I am not talking about the regular Victoria’s Secret; I am talking about Victoria’s Secret Pink-which is intended for younger women and teens. I came across a few products that carried phrases like “I’ll Show You Mine If You Show Me Yours”, “I Love French Kissing”, “Let’s Make Out”, “Your Place Or Mine?”, “Let’s Go All the Way”, “Sure Thing”, “Pin Me Down”, “French Me”, “Let’s Get Naked”, “Wild In Bed”, and “Sleep With Me”. Needless to say, this made me raise my eyebrows, as I’m sure this made you raise yours.
You might be asking yourself what is suggestive about the phrase “Sure Thing”. The phrase “Sure Thing” is a phrase that was used in the 80’s that identifies a person who will definitely have sex, without any hassles. Ask yourself; would I want my 13 year old daughter walking around in a shirt that is basically saying she’s easy?
What surprised me about this newfound sexuality is the fact that the text on their products had never been suggestive in the past. I should know; I’ve been following the Pink line since I was 12, in 2007. How do we go from “Be Happy” to “Pin Me Down”?
I also saw that the company began using the phrase “Kiss This” placed over the behinds of pants and panties. I thought this was quite clever and cute. But then, I saw a picture from an upcoming collection that had the phrase “Kiss This” on the front of the panties; right on the crotch. Are they suggesting what I think they’re suggesting?
Why is there an excess of these ostentatiously sexual products being sold by this company? Are they trying to imply that the only thing that girls want to do is get laid? Do they believe that all girls care about is boys and the actions they want to do with them? I didn’t see any products talking about careers, grades, or any future aspirations. There were no “Ivy League Bound” or “A+ or Bust!” phrases to be found. Yet, you can find numerous products that talk about everything from first base to home.
When I decided to ask a few people for opinions on the suggestiveness of products, one person said “Well, the phrase ‘Let’s go all the way’ is from a song.” Yes, it is from a song, and that song is about having sex for the first time, as a teenager. Another person pointed out that if a person is reading someone’s underwear, it is likely that they’ll probably be doing the actions that are described in the text, so it might be meant to be silly. This might be true, but I wonder why the company decided to go from a G rating to a PG-13 rating? To possibly sell more because they believe that being racier will raise sales?
I would expect suggestiveness of the like from the regular Victoria’s Secret line, which sells lingerie. But, ironically, the text on the panties from the lingerie section tend to read things like “Boy Toy”, “Hottie”, “Hi Cupcake”, and “Do You Believe In Magic?”. All of these are relatively innocent, yet these panties are aimed towards older women, and the suggestive phrases are aimed towards younger women.
Why is there a suggestion of, and even perhaps, encouraging of sex to young women and teenagers, especially seeing the high statistics of teenage pregnancy? If anything, they should be putting phrases like “Modest Is Hottest”, “Don’t Count On It”, “Saving Myself For A Rockstar”, “I’m Worth The Wait”, “In Your Dreams” and “Virgin Vamp” on products to encourage good moral character. And even “You Can Look, But Don’t Touch”, if they are bent on quoting pop songs.
Now, I’m not trying to be a prude. I like midriff tops, belly rings, and tight jeans as much as the next girl; but I think Victoria’s Secret needs to reassess who their audience is, and think about the message they want to send to impressionable minds, especially seeing how America’s education level is so inferior compared to other countries. I’m sure that Adriana Lima, who has been a Victoria’s Secret Angel for the past 10 years, and is a supporter of abstinence until marriage would agree with me.
I feel that using this type of language on tops is a glamorization of sex that is done in a seemingly innocent manner. For example, one shirt that says “I Love French Kissing” has a pink heart on it that is adorned with rhinestones. The style of this top is not seductive in appearance. It is not a sheer top, and it is not low cut. It is a baseball style shirt that is meant to be worn as a pajama top. Some people might say that it is not meant to be seen in public, and is therefore a justifiable piece to be worn in the privacy of one’s own home. But, if you take a simple observance in any given location in the United States, you are bound to see a teenage girl wearing her pajamas out in public. | I'm not good at reactions but I assure you inside my right eyebrow was raised, the left flat.
I wouldn't want my daughter wearing that shirt, but honestly I'm thirteen and I do not think that Victoria's Secret is a store a thirteen year old needs to be shopping in when it comes to clothes!
Oh ho ho, they are suggesting EXACTLY what you think they're suggesting.
That, hun, is exactly what they're implying. Odd--I thought that was what all guys wanted...
Why do we keep saying PG-13? I'm going with an NC-17 on this one. If I ever caught my daughter in underwear depicting the phrase "Boy Toy", Idk what I'd do but it wouldn't be pretty. It wouldn't even be that she was wearing something with sexual references. Just that she was wearing something that states she is nothing more than something for a boy to play around with when he's bored. I promise you my daughter will have a teensy bit more SELF RESPECT than that.
HOWEVER-Here's where I disagree with you a little. If girls WANT to wear clothing that indicates they have no self respect-let them. I don't think that we should ever force a store not to sell something just because it indicates sex. It's all up to the girl and the parents--you can't expect the world to make itself modest and save for you.
HOWEVER-Jeez, I keep rereading them and I just LOVE your phrases here -“Modest Is Hottest”, “Don’t Count On It”, “Saving Myself For A Rockstar”, “I’m Worth The Wait”, “In Your Dreams” and “Virgin Vamp” on products to encourage good moral character. And even “You Can Look, But Don’t Touch”,- They're all funny, and I have a very modest friend who I could totally see wearing the Saving Myself For A Rockstar or Don't Count On It shirt. And I would totally wear them. :D. I think you should start a clothing line with cute but not so perverted clothing for young girls. I'm serious! I want this shizz on the market! (Sorry for cursing...)
PLEASE :D | Am I too tight..?? (Pussy wise..)? So if you read my question from yesterday you would know that me and my boyfriend wanted to have sex really soon and i was wondering if i was to tight and what if his dick wouldn't fit.(i was a virgin yesterday).
So last night, we wanted to have sex so i said ok lets do it, and he had trouble getting it in me, he kept saying "damn lexy, your small" so all he pretty much did was finger me. Then after we went trick er treating (yes we are too old to go trick er treating, but hey were still teen's we wanna have fun) we started making out on his bed and we ended up getting horny and having sex, this time, he got his dick inside of me and he started like moaning "yes" like he liked how i was small..? is it a good thing that im tight..?
Question for dudes::Would you prefer a tight pussy or a lose one? And Why?
Question for the chicks::Are girls always really small when they are a virgin? does your vagina get larger the more you have sex?
And at first when i was really having sex with him it started to hurt, but the more we did it, the more it felt good. So, the more you do it, the more it will start to feel nice?
Please comment, xoxoxoxox | When you first have sex, it's not easy to penetrate. It's not that the boy is too big or that you are too small.
Lubrication is important, so if you are not turned on, or wet, then penetration will also be difficult, and has nothing to do with how tight or loose you are.
After the first couple of times you start to loosen up, but it's not like a pair of shoes that never recovers from being stretched. You will never be a virgin again but you won't become cavernous either.
Yes, the more you do it the better it feels. | Would this make me still a VIRGIN? ok this may seem like an odd question but i'm 19 now and was just thinking back to my wild days as a young teen and i remember when i was just 14 i met an older guy and we "kind of" had sex. the only reason i think about this is that up until that point i was defo a virgin. well he went inside but not all the way he tried but i was too tight and not relaxed, i didnt really want to have sex with him he was such a creep and told me to lie to his friend about my age aswell as telling me to get an abortion if i get pregnant. oh the memories ANYWAY back to topic sooo he went inside but not all the way, i didnt feel anything break and i didnt bleed and it didnt hurt (only when he was trying to get it in).
my question is does that classify me as losing my virginity at that point as i've never classed that as my first time. what do you think? | | ur a virgin. just forget that ever happened. | Why is sex just now starting to hurt? Ok I'm not a virgin obviously nor a teen...but just recently me and my bf started having sex again after my period was over..think we went maybe 2 1/2 wks schedule conflicts and of course me cycle but now everytime we have sex I'm hurting afterwards (me being wet isn't a issue) and today I was so tight I bled some...I don't get it this hasn't happened before...has anyone else been through this? | | Consult a doctor just to be safe. |
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